What the fuck is wrong with women these days?
I just got dumped by a girl the other day. We only really dated for about 3 weeks or so, but I honestly really liked her. I’ve been depressed and lonely for a long time now, and it was incredibly nice to feel attractive to someone to whom I was also rather attracted to, myself.
She confided in me that she’d never been out on a real romantic date before in her life. How does that not happen? How does a girl make it to her mid twenties without being treated like a real lady? That actually broke my heart a little inside. I believe that every single woman deserves to be taken on a real date by the guy she likes. I would have been honored to be the first to be that kind of man for her.
But I guess that’s the operative word here. MAN.
She’s dated nothing but little boys her entire adult life. Albeit, she’s only 24, and not many guys of her generation understand what being a man really means. Shit, what did most of us know at that age, anyways. Besides me, cuz I’m fucking awesome.
It’s true that there were many things that hindered our budding interest in each other. My life transition, a career snafu where we both ended up working nights, my need to take it slow due to my fears of being hurt and busy schedule. Not to mention the loose ends of my previous relationship.
Despite all that, I really liked her and really wanted to make this relationship work. It made me happy to think about her. I was excited to see her again when we actually got the chance. I even ditched the “pay-as-you-go” bullshit phone just to be better connected to her. (I did that for other reasons as well, but she was the deciding factor.)
Turns out I wasn’t good enough for her. It was my fault really, cuz I was under the impression that she was looking for a man. After all, she did get all pissy-pants with me cuz I didn’t defend her when some of our less mature male friends were politely molesting her. This, of course, was before we ever even thought of dating.
But alas, she doesn’t want me. She wants to be with a guy that’s into puppies and video games. She doesn’t want a Man, she wants a Man-Child. What the actual fuck?
I’ve been working my balls off the past few months to shake off the Man-Child stigma I had inadvertently let myself slip into. I don’t want to be broke, depressed and living on my dad’s couch anymore. I’m tired of watching the same movies over and over and reading the same books just to stave off boredom. I want to work on my art projects and build things using the manly skills I’ve developed by going out and being a goddamn man. That is, when I’m not at work at the manufacturing plant, which believe is one of the manliest jobs a guy can have
Nope. Video games. That’s what’s important to her.
I’m sorry, but I don’t play HALO. I tried once, sucked at it, and don’t feel the need to develop the skill set required to be any good. I’ve got shit to do. I stopped playing video games when I was twelve fucking years old, cuz I’d rather play in the damn woods building forts and using my fucking imagination.
I don’t feel the need to play Call of Duty, cuz I actually answered the REAL goddamn Call of Duty and “played guns” for fucking real. And in reality, it’s fucking scary as shit even when shots aren’t being fired.
And yes, I hate animals. I’m a selfish human being and don’t feel like picking up after a shit machine who flips the fuck out every time someone knocks on the door. For security, I’d rather have a gun. I can control a fucking gun.
So, it’s her fucking loss. I happen to know that I make a caring, thoughtful and affectionate boyfriend. I’m also a skillful and considerate lover. So by all means go be with a fat, lazy, irresponsible Man-Child who has no idea what to do with his penis (or tongue for that matter…). Most of them look like the previously mentioned immature friends, that you feel like you’re too good for. Me, I’m keeping my eye out for a woman who loves adventure and wants to do more with life than hate her job, play video games and sit around feeling “blah”.
Which brings me to another subject along similar lines.
Where are all the really good guys out there? You hear it all the time in films and television programs. You also hear it from your single female friends. The answer? You bitches have scared them all away.
I know you like to think you’re not a bitch. You’re not “psycho” at all. Well, you probably are. Don’t take my word for it, ask your ex-boyfriends. And all the guys they’ve told, which is probably quite a few.
I have a friend who recently attempted to start a relationship with a really great guy who happened to be going thru a divorce and possible custody battle. He has a sweet job and also happens to be a handsome and talented musician. A real catch.
But, unfortunately, he has a very busy and complex life. Now my friend also happens to have a few complex details to her life as well, so you’d think she’d have some sympathy. Nope. “How come he’s too busy to see me? Why can’t he spend more time with me? Why does he have to hide me from his soon to be ex-wife? Why doesn’t he call or text me every single day?”
Cuz he’s goddamn busy, that’s why.
Ladies, a really good guy is a fucking complicated guy. We have jobs, we have various activities, some of us even have children. Our lives aren’t a walk in the goddamn park and we often need to concentrate our time and energies into accomplishing our goals. And your goddamn whining every five goddamn minutes isn’t goddamn helping.
It doesn’t mean we don’t care and it certainly doesn’t mean we’ve lost interest. And to be perfectly honest, your weird lifestyle doesn’t make it anymore enticing. For fuck’s sake, fix your own shit and we’ll quite possibly make more of a fucking effort. Fuckl!!
You want a good man, but you don’t want all the complications of dating an ACTUAL DECENT GUY. No, you have this magical, romantic ideal that only exists in romantic comedies starring Kate Hudson. Seriously, watch How To Lose A Guy in 10 Days, but pretend Matthew McConaughey isn’t trying to hang onto her for the sake of his career. That’s you. Period. Roll credits.
You know who has time to call you everyday and spend all the time in the world catering to your needs? The guy sleeping on his parents couch with no job and plays HALO for 10+ hours a day. He’s got nothing in the world better to do. In fact, I know a few and I’d be happy to give their number. However, they don’t all look like Dane Cook. Most of them resemble Kevin Smith.
But that’s the price you pay for a guy who will be there for you at you goddamn beckon call.
So be patient with a good man or date a Man-Child. It’s up to you.
ThanXXX for reading…
--------------------------------------Jaymz
